Thin Skin

I cannot seem to hate critics who slam me without any explanation -- as if the entire world recognizes what they mean.  I left one of my stoner comments on a publishing site that is alway making stoner jokes... and where I take on this drug crazed personality.  Looking for those stoners who will listen to my show, and honing this sort of humor.  I write some very serious shit, so the comedy is like the opposite, low brow and meant to make people laugh.  The thinking comes in to, because I want my stories to 'mean' something deeper than than a cop chasing a criminal, complete with car chases and gunfire... completely be-rift of metaphors.   Like rock singers who they ask what they meant by some line you love, and they say they are not sure, that the words just sounded 'cool,' or something.  Their unconscious minds are often much smarter than what we see, and music and art tap into those areas, take us beyond the pea of our consciousness where we fret within the everyday turmoils of the day... that bit of thinking in our head that we think we are.

This negative comment came in while I was finding mistakes in the comments, and editing them.  I do that.  I rewrite them a few times if they are important to me, and the program makes it easy... like facebook.  She comes in when both comments are up, one of which I would have erased in a second, and wrote, "As if one were not bad enough.... twice.  'sigh'."   I wrote back, "Sorry you are too hipster for these jokes... bitchy one."

I was kind for me... bitchy one is much nicer than calling someone a bitch.... it just says they are being bitchy for the moment, somehow.   I still go after people, but someone merely not liking my work... shit, if I wanted to write for everyone, I would not be half the writer that I am.

My poor readers of this blog.  I used to be so much more fun to hang out with.  Kept my diaries hidden, played my serial killer character all the time, too tough to feel the emotions that my occasional poems showed in those days.

Oh, well...  I guess this is why I never watch my performances, shows, or listened to the radio show -- until it was over, and then it made me laugh a lot.... we did some funny bits, and some stupid bits.  Oh, well... the live audience was dying over me, so that was cool.

Can't wait for the radio show... and I have to keep my confidence up,  I tell myself, you have to careful with who you please in this world, and reckless about who you piss off.