People... well, virtual ones...

Here I am going on five years with this blog, having exposed about every side o this sick brain..  that hardly means most people have read these words.  My recent venture into Facebook has brought me in touch with entirely new classes of people.  Mental pockets that foment themselves on the web.  Real conspiracies and crazy ass ones getting all tossed together on the web, and they gather their readers like fans, join little personality cults with themselves, always, at the helm of that computer, the podium...  I am as guilty as the next, but at least I feel my opinions are astute, because they are based on people who are astute.  I am not always right, or even close... sometimes I write something I later find out is entirely wrong.

For years my work actually got me hated by Christians, because I was angry at religion and gave it all the usual labels, forgetting anything good there, like God, because of the abuses of man;  the prosperity preachers and the out and out nuts, avoiding blood transfusions and the like...   Now, I feel like God shook me awake.    Or more correctly, punched and kicked be awake.     Anyways... my mystical beliefs are the last thing I want to get into.  I write about them in a fictionalized form -- that is as close as I am going to being honest about the wild theories flying around in my head, except in poetry -- the words of God my friend Bob tells me.

Today, I read about someone being defreinded, and then got defriended, because I did share the same level of paranoia about the government.  Oh, well.  The wildest conspiracies could be true, but the conjecture leads to so many nutty theories... and the truths that we know are pretty fascinating, to me.  So I try to color between the lines when it comes to conspiracy  theories.

I do not believe the entire government is a big plot to kill off the population or something like that, and if such a thing is true, no one is going to tell me about.

I really prefer to work with a band of merry  pranksters than guys who think everything is going to end in guns.   Freedom.  We want freedom and we want law enforcement.  The balance between the two has never been more apparent to me, with the patriot act, and its bastard Child, the legislation McCain put through asking or the ability to hold americans without trial, in secret prisons.  What the hell is up with that?  I don't care.  Period.  It is wrong.... but, what the hell?  Does that mean the government is going to sweep in and kill a bunch of people?   I doubt they have the budget.

For years, the left has been targeted by intelligence, and they have gotten paranoid.  Rightly so.  In a way.  But there is going too far, to me...  I mean, Government is just a creation o the people, and that means that it can change.   I am not ready to give into the idea that the secret societies in this world have nearly as much power as people think, though I know they exist.  Maybe I am deluded.  Again, no one is going to tell me to start looking at the world as the metaphors for some bad star wars plot.  We are not fighting the Imperial guards, we are steering our destinies through politics, and our daily decisions....

There is nothing in this world that will ever convince me to give up on humanity.  I believe we have souls.  And a Holy Ghost inside of us.  God, a Christ like being in all of us, that he is at least one of the archtypes in our head, and often not such a bad one, as long as he is in a mental pantheon with other voices, even those from the daily news.

So I believe.  From my pod of delusion.  I was called am MKULTRA experiment today.  That is an interesting thought to me, and makes me wonder about all the strange experiences I had at the hands of the government, but I know something else was going on altogether.   I am not going to let anyone convince me I have no free will.   That is what happens to people with magical thinking.  The government becomes all bad guys, every cop a terrible asshole racist, etc....  the militias set up a self-fullfilling prophecy, they want to be attacked by the government, want to fight them, so they build a scary organization that few countries would allow to gather,  a bunch of guys who talk about bringing down the government through terrorist tactics.  They get into the head by staying on the internet with like minded buddies.  They throw out insults at issues, rather than examine them like a real human being, wondering  if the legislation means something real, or not... and try to influence the LAW.  Instead of dismissing the law as something that another owns.  NO.  You own the laws in this country.  Not some They Great They.  They are us.  We are humans, not superhumans and we do stupid ass shit all the time.  We have to then own up to our mistakes and try to fix them.

I  think that by staying engaged in the political discussion, rather than going over to preaching to some demented choir (and believe me, I could preach with the best of them should I decide to start a church, but I would not do so because I think people should think or themselves, and I want to be careful how I use the power of my words...  I do not want followers.  I want people who teach each other the lessons they have learned, or just talk, etc...  No one should take anyone's opinion too seriously.  I know by reading the dozens of papers I follow around the world that there are plenty of ways of looking at every situation.  Arabs and Jews seldom agree on what is happening.   Obviously.

What should an artist do?   What should a writer do?   I am a writer because I want to spread certain words that I have come across, and I like to entertain people, as well as make them think the thoughts that made me what I am in my best moments....  I feel like a translator, between the theories it took me years to learn, with great effort, and my audience.  Like artists have always been... it goes, prophets and scientists, then to writers and artists, then to their audiences... and then, finally, sometimes, politics.    I am just a cog in that wheel.

Man, I have been writing too much on facebook, forgetting the feeling of being home at my blog, where I am the master of the universe.  The place where the writer explains the cosmology behind the strange stories and poems that come flying out of me at a pace no one can keep up with, and certainly not me as an editor.  I figure one day I will write less, and edit more.  When some juice stops flowing out of the universe into my chest and down my arms and into my tapping my fingers and out into your mind... the poet drunk on the license he has been given to play with words.  I learned all the proper ways to use words, just so I could have a punctuation in my poetry that does not show... I leave off periods and commas often because I do not like the way they look on the page, or the idea of stopping one thought before beginning another.  Poetry should flow, one line and thought,  into another like competing streams, and the crash of ideas should be where the ephinies lie....

Gotta go take the dog to the sunny beach.  Fifty degrees in Chicago, but 40 by the lake, where I am.  The Husky girl keeps looking up at me from the floor, then sighing and laying back.  A very effective means o instilling in me that horrible guilt that often leads to dog walking, even on the nicest of days.

Go in peace today... why not?