After gettting the notice about the Chicago shows of CONAN O'BRIAN/ son of the letterman/ nerdy bud of us all/
secret barbarian warrior waiting/waiting/waiting
for the order to come down
..
i shot off an email hoping to get tickets to see him with the clownish prince dave chappel, george wendt and . . . that bad assssssss band (and wishing andy richter would show, as always).
CONAN AND CREW,
PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PLEASE LET ME COME TO THE SHOW.... I'VE BEEN SAVING SOME CLEAN UNDERWEAR FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS. WELL, PRETTY CLEAN. THE CLEANEST. WHEN I WEAR THEM, SINCE THEY ARE MY FAVORITE UNDERWEAR IN THE WHOLE WORLD, BLACK SILK WITH LITTLE WHITE PLAYBOY BUNNY HEADS, I LIKE TO TUCK A BIT OF TOLIET PAPER IN THE OLD BUM TO MAKE SURE NO STINKY CRACK JUICES SEEP INTO ME SHORTS. YOU CAN BET I'LL BE PACKING THE NIGHT OF YOUR SHOW!!! I'll be so proud if I can get Conan to sign a wad of papery bummed juices!!!! I just know he'll honor me by sniffing the pen, afterwards -- as is the way of my people, as any Harvard grad would know!!!
PLEASE OH PLEASE CHOOSE ME...I WILL SLEEP WITH ANYONE I HAVE TO.
Of course, I was only kidding about sleeping with people, because I kick in my sleep and snore and scream out for various vegetibles and squeak like the Hamster Hermie (who for some reason I always dream I am, this hamster general leading this vast, sqeauking, gasious army of sadly short taled rodents). I guess they took me seriously though, because when I showed up for the show some guy had my name on a clip board and i was made to sign some kind of release and then taken down into a grungy bathroom in the basement of the Chicago Theater, where some rough, coach like guys shaved my entire body and bathed me in a cold vat of old spice and ben gay.... WELL, THIS IS A FAMILY SHOW AND the sodomy got a little rough from here on out... so let me save that for the memoir. ... Not that I am complaining, it was worth all the money they could charge up on my credit cards to keep the party going, worth even the blood and organs they made me sell to buy them hot dogs to throw at homeless people. And sure, that is one way of feeding them... and who am i, I Pain tainted well beyond media standards of electibility for even the lowly post of piss pot removal (yes, I ran and they savaged me in the press... said since i didn't have a pot of mine own to piss in, that my jelousy would lead to sloppy clean up.... yea, maybe they did have a point... damn them their peculiar genius) to judge Conan... I mean, on anything other than the ridiculously small size of his penis.
Below is the fun notice from the crew of the conan... great barbarian warrior and lover of liberal libations!!!
Late Night with Conan O'Brien
COMES TO CHICAGO!
Congratulations! In response to your request for tickets, we are pleased to inform you that we are holding 2 tickets for you for Late Night with Conan O'Brien in Chicago! Please be aware ticket distribution is in excess of seating capacity; therefore, this reservation does not guarantee admittance. YOU MUST BRING THIS LETTER WITH YOU TO CLAIM YOUR TICKETS. There will be no exceptions.
The show you are scheduled to see will tape on WEDNESDAY, MAY 10, 2006. This letter may not be used for alternate dates.
The show will tape from 4:30 to 5:30 p.m. Your suggested arrival time is no later than 3:15, though be aware lines may form earlier. As stated above, ticket distribution is in excess of seating capacity; therefore, a ticket/reservation does not guarantee admittance. Lines will form outside The Chicago Theatre on the North East corner of State Street and Lake Street. Please be advised that the taping schedule is subject to change, possibly without notice.
Should you have any questions, please refer to our website at www.nbc.com/conan or the theater's website at www.thechicagotheatre.com.
We look forward to seeing you there!
Any fool can think. The real trick is to unthink. TRUST NO ONE WHO HAS MORE ANSWERS THAN QUESTIONS...we are trapped in a forest of lies... and time has come to burn it down!!! Only takes one well placed torch...
A blood soaked Arthur IS RISING
Gonzo journalism and fiction is a tricky mix.... Welcome to my razor's edge.
HELLO THERE...
I am an elf in the attic making mind toys with sharp edges; an educated writer who gets good reviews, who you can read for free in the rough form of first drafts on the web, or purchase in a book form.
The best soldier does not attack. The superior fighter succeeds without violence. The greatest conqueror wins without struggle. The most successful manager leads without dictating. This is intelligent non aggressiveness. This is called the mastery of men.
tao
tao
Welcome to you, I am John Scott Ridgway, Novelist, Poet, Blogger, Radio and TV writer and actor... five books, also paint in oils and acrylics. I am poet warrior of sorts, a non violent radical, personally, though understanding of those who choose other paths IN THE EIGHTY PLUS COUNTRIES AT LAST COUNT THAT came in this blog ...
The predicted revolutions in the USA and around the would are going to
be violent in the next twenty years, is what the CIA says. I want them to stay peaceful, which is the only way to win this struggle between haves and have nots. They have more guns, we have more people,, and they include the mothers and sisters and brothers of the people they will ask to fight us.... I think they underestimate the police.
NEVER ACCEPT APPEASEMENT OVER JUSTICE. By any means necessary is the reality. . . the USA can be spared stupid wars, but other countries. . . need different solutions. . .
The number of Countries that have come in to have a look at this blog humbles me. Thank you very much.
NEVER UNDERESTIMATE HOW MUCH I DESPISE VIOLENCE
EXCEPT UNDER EXTRAORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES BY
PROFESSIONALS, HOPEFULLY, like the police, military, etc...
understanding that violence is sometimes needed
does not mean I like anything about the sound
of fists hitting faces
Boxing is too much for me
make me feel like I am watching
dog fights with toothless pitbulls
"I am an artist first, and a politician second," as John Lennon said.
My intentions are to stop the violence from entering into
revolutionary wars
the CIA
predicts
will break out in the next twenty years all over the
world, including here...
But Ill tell ya,
if there is not some redistribution of
wealth here there and everywhere
WE WILL WITNESS THE HORROR
THE HORROR
OF WAR ON all OUR SHORES
My intentions is to keep these protests peaceful
so we can win
without bloodshed
Total War for Total Peace
Never incites violence
or destroys property
you should be able
to go to protests with strollers and babies
parents feeling as safe as the police
Now, poetry...
I am too far out into the battlefield to retreat. This CHARGE is win or die...
PROPHECIES OF ECSTASIES AND HORRORS
be aware
be very aware
total war
for total peace
is being fought
HERE
THERE will be many ways to die
and only one to live
give and give and give
until the worlds downtrodden and oppressed
can begin to forgive
before things get bloody and ruthless
My Peace sign shot full of holes
and my reason ignored
drowned out by the roar of machine guns
You cannot break the golden rule
all the time and not expect
consequences from nature
mankind
we will fight for our right to thrive as well
we do not accept your sentence
to poverty so you can earn more
by shipping the factory off to China
WE ACCEPT NO CHAINS...
BREAK THOSE WE HAVE
COME RUNNING FOR OUR OPPRESSORS
WHO THE HELL WOULDN'T???
nothing this mindgame in america can do to us
can destroy this thing inside that yearns for freedom
enough to die in the name of JUSTICE
generation after generation
from time
immemorial
can destroy this thing inside that yearns for freedom
enough to die in the name of JUSTICE
generation after generation
from time
immemorial
No more hyper-reality FOR US. We have already spent too long in an oasis of belief where nothing is wrong, folks... Now, we must face this was all a mirage... and try like hell to get out of this desert... or resolve ourself to the fact that we will leave our children to starve in the barren sands.
There are better ways to defeat an enemy than an outright fight, especially if you are vastly outnumbered, like the Elite. MSM PSY-WAR allows them to control our actions through our thoughts, and basically stop our FORCE from activating. I am not saying we should fight just because we can win, I am just saying we should fight before we lose, if no other option is left us.... because a world is at stake.
They SET UP LAWS THAT ALLOW THEM TO STEAL. MURDER. BRAINWASH THEIR CRITICS. We must begin to feel challenged now to stop them. Or WE WILL LOSE EVERYTHING. PERIOD. THE SKY, OTHER SPECIES, OUR WATER... OUR MINDS. No more hyper-reality for us... too long in that oasis where nothing is wrong folks... we must face this is all a mirage.
A cruel slap woke me to the PAIN
at the moment of birth;
My first cry was NO
buried in unintelligible screams.
I am a man now.
Now I catch your hand and break all the fingers.
at the moment of birth;
My first cry was NO
buried in unintelligible screams.
I am a man now.
Now I catch your hand and break all the fingers.
the promise
You must be whoever the enemy fears the least
or fears the most.
No other position is safe
or fears the most.
No other position is safe
da general
Welcome to the spark that inflames TOTAL WAR FOR TOTAL PEACE.
I am too far out into the battlefield to retreat. This CHARGE is win or die...
THE ELVES ATTIC is stories, poetry, essay's, peculiar events in my life . . . oil painting, articles.
Your patience for bearing with me on my first drafts is a much appreciated kindness. Your worldwide interest is my muse . . .Lately I have been writing a book called Gangsta General x, about a revolutionary in the USA, who is fighting to keep the revolt peaceful as things spin out of control in the states after a famine gets the populace hungry enough to change their society once and for all....
HOW TO USE THIS BLOG: There is a black and white jukebox in the right column that you can shut off, or find songs on.... To listen to the COMEDY SKITS FROM THE SHOW PEACE AND PIPEDREAMS... turn off the black jukebox, and turn on the Green one. I play Moon Bong Haze and Jesus...
I have five majors, five books, two tv shows, a radio show, 76 countries at last count on this site alone, and over a million online readers to my credit. I can't thank any of you enough for all of your help and encouragement over the years; the favors and aide that has been offered me, the trust in my leadership... you are all SACRED TO ME ... even you folks I tend to hate.
TOTAL WAR FOR TOTAL PEACE -- Thank you especially. Your sacrifices live on. I salute you... and SWEAR ON THE GODS OF MY FATHERS THAT WE WILL TRIUMPH AND YOUR DEATHS WILL BE PAID FOR IN BLOOD AND TREASURE.
Thank you.
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Thank YOU for over a half million hits at my various sites ... new counter.
one war
The collected john scott ridgway
a demented little entry into philosophy, humour and redemption.,
the elves attic
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